private universe
by tedtonksed
Summary: Every couple has their moments. These are some of theirs. F/R


**Title: **Private Universe  
**Rating: **T  
**Word Count: **2,672  
**Fandom: **Glee  
**Character/Pairing: **Finn/Rachel  
**Spoilers: **S1 and S2.01-02  
**Summary: **Song drabbles  
**Disclaimer:** Do not own Glee or any of the songs mentioned. I do own my iPod though...  
**A/N: **Found this hidden amongst all my half-started fanfictions and thought I'd post it up. Noting that it was started way back before the back nine and then finished after so any bits that don't match up; just ignore. Title was also a shuffle choice but it seemed appropriate (Private Universe - Crowded House)

* * *

**Somewhere In Between – Lifehouse**

_I can't be losing sleep over this  
No, I can't  
And I cannot stop pacing  
Give me a few hours  
And I'll have this all sorted out  
If my mind would just stop racing_

The first night after Finn found out that Drizzle wasn't his baby, that Quinn had in fact cheated and lied about it for all these months, he couldn't sleep. Now that wasn't abnormal for him, normally he wouldn't go to sleep until at least the early hours of the morning, which just meant he could use classtime for a nap. Which he had to anyway, because if he fell asleep during football, Kurt would try to give him a makeover again and if he fell asleep in Glee, Rachel would probably blow a gasket.

Rachel.

He knew deep down she was just trying to help him. Well that and he'd heard Mercedes and Tina talking about how Rachel had told simply to break him and Quinn up so she could have him to herself. But Finn didn't believe that. Besides he liked the fact that one of the first things she did after finding out was tell him the truth. Unlike Quinn and _him _and even the rest of Glee, who judging from their un-surprised faces (besides Mike who just looked scared) all knew, Rachel was the only who manned up and was honest, even if it was for her own benefit. It still made him fell all warm and happy inside, kinda like he does after eating his mom's apple pie. Finn tried to push his sudden burst of hunger down as he lay back in bed. Sleep still didn't come as his head continued to swim._  
_

**Baby Tell Me I'm the Only One – Thirsty Merc**

_Could it be  
That I need you  
Baby tell me I'm the only one  
I'm a fool  
When I'm with you  
Baby tell me I'm the only one_

Rachel prided herself on the fact she didn't need anyone. Sure, she depended on her fathers for basic necessities, such as food, shelter and the love of a family, and she never knew her biological mother so the idea of a mother's love was foreign to her. But other than her parents, Rachel had never felt the need to be cared about or liked by her peers. However it wasn't until Glee came into her life that she realised what she was missing. Watching Mercedes, Kurt, Tina and Artie interacting with each other, sharing inside jokes and laughing, caused a pang inside her stomach as she watched from the outside, never belonging. Sure anyone could see that Rachel had her future set firmly in stone, she would hit Broadway and they all knew it, but she couldn't help but think, was it all worth it when you had no-one to share it with? And then Finn came along, sweet unknowing Finn and became the first person to treat her normally, like she wasn't just the overdriven singing freak who everyone threw their slushies at. It was Finn who made her heart race and her brain turn to mush. It was Finn who made her realise that she may just need someone.

**Lean On Me – Club Noveau **

_Please swallow your pride  
If I have things you need to borrow  
For no one can fill  
Those of your needs  
That you won't let show_

It was one of those things that bothered Finn the most. After everything they had been through, every lie, judgement and conversation, after several months of being together, Rachel still couldn't come to him with her problems. He of course went to her with everything; she was his main confidant when it came to understanding homework, his worries about his mom, about whether he was performing their Glee songs correctly whereas she came to him with barely anything. Sure they would talk about whether or not her clothing made her look as frumpy as Kurt says, about the way she hits the notes in Glee and how her fathers were doing. It was the more important things she left out, like how several of the older Cheerios who weren't scared of Santana and the Glee-bound footballers had been mocking her once more, how she had heard several students laughing at her lack of a mother and her two gay dads. He wanted to hear about her worries that she couldn't bring her performance levels and school work to the point she needed for Julliard, that she might not make it to Broadway, that she was scared their own relationship couldn't make the grade for the years after graduation. Most of all Finn just wanted her to lean on him the way he leaned on her.

**Never Too Late – Nathan King**

_When the door's locked I know you said;  
Take the window out instead _

Sex wasn't a taboo subject in Rachel's mind. She truly believed every word she had said in that single Celibacy Club meeting; it wasn't just a ploy to attract Finn to her side. And now, months after that meeting, months after their official relationship started, and months after celibacy became just a tiny speck in their minds, sex still didn't bother Rachel at all. It bothered Finn though. He was fine with the whole act itself; it was the mention outside of their private liaisons that bothered him. It was Puck making crude hand gestures behind Rachel's back, it was the muffled giggles from Kurt and Santana when he had accidently blurted out what they had done, it was Quinn and the whole dark cloud she had placed over the idea of sex with her hot-tub lie. But something Rachel had taught him about being negative and always needing a positive side has Finn thinking of all the happy sex-related moments he had, the coy yet innocent look on Rachel's face the first time she had brought it up, the laughter as he climbed out her bedroom window because her dads had locked him inside, the climbing inside his _own _window when he had been locked outside (stark naked mind you) and it made a whole difference in the world to Finn. (Although he still thinks it should be completely private.)

**Hey Boys and Girls (Truth of the World Pt. 2) – Evermore**

_What do you wanna hear first?  
Bad news or the worst_

After finally figuring out the truth about Quinn's baby, the first thought that crossed Rachel's mind was how to tell Finn. There was no doubt in her mind about him needing to know, it was just common knowledge. And alright so there may have been a few selfish reasons thrown in the mix, but the main reason was there; he _needed _to know. It was just the question of how much did he need to know. She initially thought that she could just tell him the baby wasn't his, and then let Quinn break the news about Noah to him. But then Rachel kept thinking, she was terrific actress – if she did say so herself – but when it came to Finn, she was like an open book, she wouldn't be able to hide the fact she knew every detail (alright not _every _detail) about the baby's true paternity and she couldn't hide that. The two solutions weighed themselves in Rachel's head, but not once did the idea of not telling Finn at all cross her mind. She'd gathered that all of Glee minus Finn knew about Quinn and Noah – as much as they thought she didn't notice, the whole club 'party-line' wasn't exactly well hidden. From her position next to him in Glee, Rachel finally came to a decision; she would let Finn choose how much she would tell him. And finally everything would be good again...wouldn't it?

**11:11 PM (CST) – The All-American Rejects**

_It's only us,  
It's only now,  
A simple wish,  
It's only tonight._

On their last night before graduation, Finn wanted nothing more than to curl up in Rachel's living-room and watch one of her numerous musicals with her. He knew Puck and the other footballers in their year were planning on partying hard and were most likely going to show up tomorrow with huge hangovers, or if they drank like Puck did, still drunk. But no matter how sappy or girly it was, Finn wanted to spend every moment he could with his girlfriend, she was heading to NYU and in extension Broadway like she hoped, and he finally managed to score a musical scholarship to a college that was still at least 4 hours away from Rachel. And no matter how many promises to visit every weekend, and call every night, he had a sinking feeling that they were just words and they wouldn't hit the year mark for a long-distance relationship. But as he sat, Rachel snuggled into his lap, _West Side Story_ blaring on the TV; he couldn't help but think that maybe they could make it work._  
_

**Hanging by a Moment – Lifehouse**

_I'm falling even more in love with you  
Letting go of all I've held on to  
I'm standing here until you make me move  
I'm hanging by a moment here with you_

It was the week after their big win at Sectionals, that Finn finally had the guts to talk to Rachel. He knew he had feelings for her, hell everyone knew she had feelings for him, but after her big plan to tell him about Quinn fell through, Finn knew it was his call to make the next move. He cornered her after Mr Schue ran out – to find Ms. Pillsbury, Rachel had announced to them as a whole – and almost dragged her out of the choir-room. He knew it was time, she hadn't been avoiding him like everyone else was, she'd hugged him after their win, rode back to Lima with him – although that was more to avoid Jacob – and had even held his hand tightly after their impromptu dance mash-up and now it was his turn to man up. He led her down the hallway, deliberately avoiding where Mr Schue had run before stopping them next to her locker. And then the word-vomit started, he began to bather – much like Rachel herself – and everything came out, how he felt about Quinn and the baby, how he hated Puck so much at that moment, how he was so relieved that they won, how he despised Jacob for lusting after her, and how deep down no matter what, he loved her. Finally trailing off, Finn waited. It was her move once more._  
_

**Walk On Water or Drown – Mayday Parade**

_And then I fell into pieces  
And she fell into me  
Saying play me a song it's been too long  
Since I've heard you sing_

The night after they lost Regionals, Finn found himself in another funk. The one thing he had been fighting for, had grown to depend on in the last couple of months was over. Glee club was over. He leant forcibly against the seat at the back of the bus and clutched his head in his hands. At the front of the bus he could see Mercedes, Kurt and Tina talking somberly and Artie's wheelchair perched next to Rachel, her head resting against his shoulder in solitude. Rachel's face was tracked with tearstains and Finn wondered if they were just for the loss of Glee club. He had seen the looks of triumph aimed at her by Jesse and his heart lurched out for her. Catching his eye, she smiled tiredly and stood to her feet. Behind her, Finn could see Mercedes gesturing wildly and he caught the words 'Quinn', 'Puck', 'baby'. His heart lurched again. Seeing the look on Puck's face as he entered the waiting room and alerted them all that Quinn and her daughter were fine hadn't helped Finn at all. Watching as Mr. Schue had hugged Puck tightly to him, as Puck cried for the first time since his dad had packed up and left, had just left Finn wondering if they would have done that for him, if he had been the father.

"Sing for me." A quiet voice murmurs against his ear. Looking up, he sees Rachel curled up into his side, smiling sadly. "Sing for me." She repeats and he tilts his head in confusion. "Glee might be over, but you can't stop singing. Otherwise you might not again. So sing for me." She explains, pressing a kiss to his cheek and Finn's heart rises once more.

**All I Want – Joni Mitchell**

_I want to have fun, I want to shine like the sun  
I want to be the one that you want to see  
I want to knit you a sweater  
Want to write you a love letter  
I want to make you feel better  
I want to make you feel free_

Truthfully, Rachel likes to think that she's not like the other girls she goes to school with. She doesn't follow the same fashion trends, she doesn't prescribe to the same social norms, she doesn't even have the same family structure. But when it comes to Finn Hudson, she finds herself mimicking almost every other teenage girl at McKinley High. She begins to get tongue-tied around him, starts blathering about everything and anything; just to avoid awkward silences, she starts seeking him out in the halls and timing visits to her locker at the exact time she know he'll be near there. When they finally make their relationship official (and official official, not I'm really into this relationship but he's not-official) she finds herself still wanting to please him. When she catches him looking upset after being kicked from the football team, she wants to be the one to make him smile again, she fights for her solos in Glee club; just so she's the only one who can sing with him, when they bicker for the first time about her actions towards Sunshine; she gives him an out; just in the hopes he would say no. When it comes to Finn Hudson, she just wants to be the overly-excited girl who does so many cheesy stereotypical things for her boyfriend; just because she can._  
_

**Come Undone – Vanessa Carlton**

_I've seen myself in a thousand faces  
Strung out on life's path  
I would add up what you mean to me  
But I cannot do the math__  
_

She spent her whole childhood dreaming of it, but when she finally gets it, Rachel Berry realises that Broadway was not as easy as she'd hoped. She spent her childhood imagining that a bigshot director would spot her MySpace videos or would attend a Glee competition and pick her out and say, "That's her. In real life, it took four years after graduating at McKinley (top of her year, thank you very much) and three years at NYU before she even landed a role outside of school. The majority of her time is spent between her job as a waitress at a tiny yet popular karaoke bar and school work, all shoved around rehearsals, auditions and trying to keep her relationship afloat. The four years she's spent living in new York has introduced her to a lot of people, the majority of them with the same dreams as her; to make it big on the stage. Of these people, Rachel has seen at least five of them give up and go home. She's determined not to be one of those people. She has her own strength and her own voice, and then she has the combined strength of her parent's support and the soft-hearted and loving encouragement of Finn, who himself is slowly plodding through school, determined to inspire and help high school underdogs like Mr. Schue had for them. But as she gets home and enters their tiny apartment, to see Finn setting up a candlelit dinner and clutching a small, black ring-box, Rachel thinks that maybe her Broadway dreams aren't coming true, but she can always replace them with more.

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**A/N: Tada! And it's done! Sorry for any mistakes; they are all my own fault. :)**


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